Heartache or Heart Attack?

So last week I was sincerely hoping that this flu/cold would leave this home like you would wish some unseen ghost that haunts houses,haha. But not to be here at our house. I had the worst attack of the flu I've ever had. Was throwing up every 15 minutes and didn't sleep for almost 3 days. I'm thinking I have the worst flu of my life when my heart starts to hurt extremely bad. I'm thinking oh, it's definitly just because I'm dehydrated. So, I finally get a doc to give me some anti nausea medicine to help the nausea. I feel like Ishould start to rebound. But I wake up the 4th morning and can't see. I go to stand up and everything is blurry and my heart aches like I've never felt before. I start to think about my crazy symptoms and maybe they are related to high blood pressure. I've had that problem before when I had Alaria and about 2 years ago, and the symptoms seem the same. But I let it go for the day. I am sitting there at midnight, tears running down my face wondering when will this heartache go away? I get worried that maybe this heart pain is real, so by 2am Tyler talks me into going to the nearest pharmacy with a blood pressure cuff. So, I barely make it to Walmart. Seriously almost crashed because I'm seeing dots in my vision. I get there and it ready 178/ 122. OK Thats Heart Attack. I am still not going to the hospital because let me just say in the last year my experiences with the hospital here in New Mexico has been less than stellar. I called Tyler and he told me to go to Walgreens and have a pharmacist take it. So I did and it read about the same. The pharmacist tells me to go straight to the ER. I was only a block away. I didn't want to go figuring that they would do what they have done the WHOLE YEAR. Treat me like crap and take a lot of our money and send me home telling me to see a Doctor.haha Like there are no Doctors there. I seriously have some kind of jinx when it comes to ER Doctors and Nurses. I always get the absolute worst. But I'm scared that it's more than heartache that my body simply wont do what I've always wanted it to. So, I relent and go the the Rio Rancho Presbyterian Hospital. Where I've been several times, unfortunately with my health issues and last years car accident. When I get there my blood pressure is reading 168/ 119. So, I told Tyler to try and find someone to come sleep with the kids, unfortunately nobody answers their phones at 3AM. So I was alone. The "Nurse" came in and told me, " come on we're going to the ultra sound room". So, I guess I'm supposed to follow him since I"m apparantley waisting his time. So, I'm quickly realizing, Crap this isn't going to be good. I about pass out as I try to keep up with his dissapearing back. Since when do you not wheel a patient to get an X-Ray anyways? Not sure. I make it there and the x-ray tech decides to yell at him to come back and get me when I throw up on her. haha. Still very nauseous. They leave me in my room for over 2 hours and the blood pressure monitor hooked up to me is beeping the WHOLE time becuase it's extremely high. While I'm sitting there crying I hear many sirens and hear there is a major wreck coming into the little ER. "Great", I think. Now I will just have my heart attack and they can find me when they finish up with the others. Finally after the more than surly nurse man, who you can see has deep contempt for this idiotic girl claiming to have chest pains. Trying to figure out why they are being so horrible to me the doc steps in and tells me he sees that I've been in the ER with a mysterious pelvic pain in the past. "Yes," I say."I had a bladder surgery at the end of December and was diagnosed with Interstitial Cystitis." Oh, that explains why you're blood is a little thick and you're heart rate is so high. It's from your surgery you had OVER A MONTH AGO????? I just stare because I know exactly what he is thinking. He can see in my patient history that I suffer from fibromyalgia a mysterious pain disorder that hardly any doctor understands or cares about. Plus my new diagnosis of a bladder disorder that causes severe pain in the pelvis and is also not curable and quite mysterious. He says, "You have White Lab Coat Syndrome. Every time you get near a Doctor your blood pressure goes up. And quite frankly you have many Unexplained pains that no one can explain." As I stare in real disbelief because frankly I espected it to be bad, but not quite this bad. I let the tears just roll on down as usual I hear disdain in the Doctor and Surly Nurses voice. "You heartbeat is a little irradic and you're blood is a little abnormal, thicker than normal, but you just need to see your primary care physician sometime soon." I cant even speak. The surly man nurse who thinks it's funny I guess procedes to tell me that it's true everytime I've been in the ER in the last while and the records they have on me show my blood pressure is high, but it's because I get nervous when I go to the Doctor because i'm in mysterious pain. By now, I know they just plain don't believe my words although my heart rate and blood pressure continue to be high as he is unhooking me he tells me to buy a blood pressure cuff and test it at home for awhile to see if it really is a problem and when I get home I'll see it will drop and become normal. So I march out and get into my car at 5Am. I sit and wonder why would anyone treat anyone like that? I guess I lost a lot that night. What little hope I had left in Doctors maybe. I cried my way home nearly wrecking my car. Realizing somewhere in those reports a Doctor had written something about me and my previous visits to the ER with other concerns as I have been sick, really sick, for 10 long years. I felt very small and pretty horrible. Today Tyler bough a blood pressure cuff. All day it has read 160-170/ 110-119. Here I sit at whatever time it is, no idea feeling very alone and realizing that by Monday, When I can get to my primary care physician ,who didn't notice that last year when I got very ill my sugar count was 420, most people go into a coma by then, that I had aquired diabetes from a medication I was taking. Finally a nurse noticed and while he was out of town another doctor diagnosed me. Anyways in the end it might be heartache and a heart attack before I can get into a doctor who could care less if I am sick or NOT????